Why do I feel relief now that he doesn't respond?

You feel that way because you did everything within your power to win his affection and he didn't do anything. Now you feel free and you don't have to wait for your his call. You are very lucky in that way because what do want someone who only have time to get drunk? That's the worst tragedy than can happen to a woman being married to an alcoholic. It doesn't work and it never will. Thank God for that.